You thought you’d be further along by now. That’s what everyone else seems to think, too. But grief doesn’t care about time lines or other people’s expectations of how you should be healing.
The truth is, you’re barely holding it together. You smile and say you’re fine because it’s easier than explaining that some days you can’t even remember what you were doing five minutes ago. Your brain feels foggy. Everything takes twice the energy it used to. And you’re so tired of carrying this alone.
This four-day retreat in McMinnville, Oregon gives you space to actually feel what you’re feeling without anyone trying to fix you or rush you through it.
Susan and Sandy have spent years working with women through all kinds of loss. Death, divorce, estrangement, miscarriage, the end of a dream you had for your life. Whatever you’re grieving, there’s room for it here.
Through private sessions, practical tools for working with intense emotion, and the simple relief of being heard without judgment, you’ll find ways to carry this grief so that it doesn’t crush you. This isn’t about moving on. It’s about learning to carry what you’ve lost without losing yourself in the process.
Grief hits at the strangest times. You’re fine in the grocery store, and then a song comes on and you’re crying in the cereal aisle. You wake up okay, and by noon, you can’t remember why any of this matters.
People keep asking how you’re doing, and you’ve run out of ways to say “not great” without making them uncomfortable. They mean well, but they don’t get it. They think that if enough time passes, you’ll just be fine again. But you’re not fine. And you’re exhausted from pretending.
McMinnville is quiet. It’s wine country, a small town, the kind of place where you can actually breathe. You’ll stay at a nearby hotel and spend your days working with Susan and Sandy at their place. It’s comfortable, cozy and safe… the kind of space where you can fall apart if you need to.
Susan and Sandy start by just listening. What happened. What it’s been like. The complicated feelings nobody else wants to hear about. The guilt, mixed with relief, mixed with rage. They’ve worked with enough grieving women to know all of it is normal, even the parts that feel shameful.
Then they start giving you actual tools. How to notice when you’re spiraling before you’re in the middle of it. What to do with your body when the panic hits. Ways to ground yourself that work at 2 am when you can’t sleep or in the middle of the workday when it all comes crashing back. These aren’t abstract ideas. They’re specific techniques you’ll use next week.
Some sessions are with both of them, some one-on-one. They work with what you need each day. If talking helps, you talk. If you’re too exhausted, you don’t. There will be time to walk the town, sit in a café, explore the vineyards, or go back to your hotel and sleep. Whatever your body needs.
By day two, your chest doesn’t feel quite as tight. You’re sleeping a bit better. One of the tools they taught you actually worked when the panic started creeping in. Small things, but when you’ve been drowning, small things matter a lot.
By day three, you’re starting to see a path forward. Not that the grief is gone, but that you can carry it without it crushing you. You laugh at something and don’t immediately feel guilty. You make a plan for next month. You start to believe that maybe you can honor what you lost and still have a life.
Susan and Sandy help you see that grief doesn’t have to swallow you whole. That you can feel it and function. That the weight gets easier to carry when you have the right tools and someone who actually understands what you’re going through.
You’ll leave with practical skills that work. You’ll leave having spent four days with people who didn’t minimize your pain or rush you through it, but who also showed you that you’re stronger than you thought.
And you’ll leave knowing that healing doesn’t mean forgetting. It means learning to live again.
It’s just you – You get four days with Susan and Sandy. No group. No other people’s stories to manage. Just yours. Everything is adapted to what you need each day, not what’s on a pre-determined schedule.
You work with both of them – Most coaching is one person. Here you get two. Susan might catch something Sandy doesn’t. Sandy might ask the question that cracks something open. Between them, they’ve worked with enough grief to know when to push gently and when to just sit with you.
They’ve heard it all – The anger at the person who died. The relief you feel guilty about. The way you’re grieving something nobody else understands. Susan and Sandy have sat with women through every kind of loss. They won’t be shocked by what you’re feeling.
You get real tools, not just talking – They’ll teach you what to do when panic hits at 2am. How to ground yourself when you’re spiraling. Actual techniques you can use when you’re back home and feeling like you can’t breathe.
McMinnville lets you step away – Sometimes you need to be somewhere that isn’t your life to actually process your life. It’s quiet here. You can walk, think, or just sit without everything at home pulling at you.
There’s no right way to do this – You don’t have to be at a certain stage. You don’t have to have processed it “enough.” Susan and Sandy work with wherever you actually are.
This is a private retreat designed around your needs. The following represents a typical rhythm, but all your sessions are adjusted based on what emerges and what you’re ready for.
Pricing:
Day 1 – Arrival and Beginning
Evening – Rest. Walk the town if you’d like. Let the quiet settle in.
Day 2 – Speaking What Hasn’t Been Said
Evening – Journaling prompts if you want them. Otherwise, rest.
Day 3 – The Deeper Work
Evening – Rest, reflect, and integrate.
Day 4 – Integration and Moving Forward
We invite you to our table as friends & family. Water, tea, and coffee, as well as healthy snacks like fruit and nuts, are included in your booking.
We know and love the best health food places in town and during your retreat days we invite you to explore fresh, regional, mostly organic food.
We will adapt to your dietary wants and needs, whether you are vegetarian, vegan, GF or you have other wishes.
Susan Cook
As a lifelong counselor and life coach, Susan embodies her craft.
Being a Professional Certified Retirement Coach and someone who is in the last chapters of her life, she understands the urgency for folks to take inventory of what’s still important to be lived.
“This is the time you have to make sure there are no regrets in order to feel fulfilled by caring for your unfinished dreams.”
She is always looking for openings where she can support others to believe in themselves.
She has always had a natural and passionate interest in what makes people “tick”– what makes each person uniquely who they are.
In her role as coach, Susan hears and senses patterns in people that both support and obstruct their self-development.
She sees her work as guiding people into their essence and authenticity; the most effective place from which to live and make decisions.
From her training with a Master’s degree in counseling and through numerous years of experience both in education and business settings, Susan can easily relate to people from a wide variety of backgrounds.
She helps her clients chip away at their own interior sculpture waiting to be revealed and shaped. Susan is a passionate “life teacher!”
Sandrina Weller
Sandrina Weller offers a unique global perspective informed by her experiences living and working across cultures.
As a bi-national citizen, Sandy brings a unique perspective to her coaching work with women.
Sandy, although a fluent English speaker, is always translating through the lens of language, culture, and meaning.
She can see that the same language speakers constantly assume meaning through what is being said, yet often miss what is being said.
Sandy uses this asset to slow down communication with her clients in profound ways so that deeper inquiry and reflection can occur.
As a Systemic Integrative Coach and Breath Work Coach, she helps participants break free from limiting patterns and uncover profound new perspectives on life.
These special coaching tools and processes help her to focus on supporting her clients to “jump the system” of their chronic thinking and behavior patterns and open a wide perspective on the bigger picture of the various systems they belong to.
Sandy’s playful, curious approach and wide-ranging life experiences make her a compassionate and inspiring guide for women navigating change. She is curious, fun, and deeply committed to the challenges and dilemmas facing women today.
Making special memories in McMinnville!
Nestled in the heart of Willamette Valley, McMinnville was just nominated as the friendliest small town in Oregon!
With an inviting climate that’s temperate year-round, McMinnville is a great place to visit in any season. Hospitable, welcoming, and very friendly, the town is an ideal destination for a weekend getaway or a longer break to unwind, explore, and choose your own adventure.
Whether you’re in the mood to sip local wines, enjoy the Pacific Northwest scenery, or simply stroll the cozy streets of this historic Oregon college town where you can browse galleries, family-owned businesses, and unique boutiques, McMinnville offers a variety of experiences to make your visit unforgettable, and our Coaching to Connection workspace is right downtown on 3rd Street!
Airport transfer:
For an additional fee ($100/one way) we can pick you up at Portland International Airport. The travel time by car is between one and two hours, depending on traffic.
Accommodation:
We have countless cozy Hotels or Airbnb’s here in McMinnville. If you would like our recommendations or support please reach out- we’re here to help.
Other venues:
If you prefer to meet at a different venue (i.e. at the coast) feel free to reach out to us and we’ll do our best to accommodate your preferences.